Put me on stage and I am comfortably at home.  But put me in an unstructured social situation and I start to squirm.  Making connections in business is critical!  To help with this, the Etiquette Coach, Patricia Rossi shows us how to master your minglability in her guest post.

“Do you feel awkward in social situations?  Here are five tips to help you master your “minglability.”  Ninety percent of the population has stated that they feel uncomfortable and awkward in networking situations.

  1. Make others feel at ease. Go with the intention to make other people feel at ease.  Since you know that 90% of our population is nervous and awkward in social situations, then you can go with that aim to make someone else feel at ease.  It will help take the pressure off how you are feeling.
  1. Remember names. When someone tells you their name remember it and use it.  In a social exchange what sounds better to you, a simple “Nice to meet you.” or “It is so nice to meet you TOM.”?  Always use the person’s name during the conversation.  When we remember to say another person’s name it automatically puts them at ease.  Just like that you’re building a new business or personal relationship.
  1. Build other people up. When someone tells you what they love the Bucs, the Yankees, or tiramisu, this is a perfect opportunity to engage, build rapport and acknowledge the person speaking.  It’s a simple two-step process:

Step One.  Simply repeat back what they told you they like: “You love the Yankees.”

Step Two.  Ask a question: “How long have you been a fan?”  And just like that the person feels heard, acknowledged and important.

  1. What to talk about.  So what in the world do you talk about you when you’ve already talked about the traffic and the weather and you find that there’s a lull in the conversation.  Bring up something topical that doesn’t involve a scandal.  I know I know, it seems like an impossibility.  You could talk about your last ski trip, a favorite restaurant, the newest invention.  There is a plethora of things that you can talk about that are positive and life enhancing.  Just remember it’s a conversation and not an interrogation.  So there should be a nice balance in between questions and answers and between the people you are conversing with.
  1. Gossip. If a person is gossiping or says a snide remark about any other living, breathing being, buster move away from them at the speed of light or even sound.  They are not the kind of person that you want to build a long-lasting relationship with.”

Patricia Rossi’s “Manners Minute” TV segments air weekly on NBC, CBS, FOX, ABC and other affiliates throughout the U.S.  Patricia is a sought after etiquette coach, consultant, public speaker, columnist, television and radio personality.  Patricia’s focus is on kindness as opposed to formality, relationships…not rules.  Her seminars on social and professional protocol are engaging and shed new light on modern manners from business leaders, professional athletes, children and young adults in real life situations.